In what might be the most unhinged but charming Hollywood stunt of the decade, Brad Pitt and Javier Bardem showed up at the London premiere of their racing drama F1 not in designer tuxedos but as an alpaca and a sloth
No, no, this is not a fever dream or a discarded Zootopia scene. It is real. Well, sort of real. They seemed to be both seasoned actors and noted meme icons in the thirstier corners of the internet, taking things to absurd new heights by transforming into petting zoo animals for charity. The event was dubbed “Paws & Paparazzi,” and fans in attendance were treated to an exclusive experience that included hugs, selfies, and even “emotional support Brad pillows.”
Donning an impeccably groomed alpaca suit with a complete blinking animatronic, yes, the reporter told “I’ve played a lot of roles—vampire, stuntman, Benjamin Button—but I’ve never been this fluffy. And honestly, it feels right.” He then offered a soft “Meeeep” to a nearby toddler, who was convinced he was a Pokémon.
Javier Bardem, meanwhile, emerged in a disturbingly accurate sloth costume, moving in slow motion across the red carpet, stopping every few feet to pose like he was melting into the pavement. “Sloths are misunderstood creatures,” he drawled. “I feel their soul. Especially on Mondays.”
The idea, allegedly born during a round of “reading thirst tweets” backstage, escalated when fans repeatedly compared Bardem to “a slow, sexy jungle snack” and Pitt to “a hug with abs.” Not ones to disappoint, the actors decided to fully lean into the madness. A mobile mini petting zoo was set up right outside Leicester Square, with hay bales, grass mats, and even a VIP cuddle zone called “Snuggle Circuit.”
Fans queued up for over two hours to hug the stars. One woman fainted after Brad (in alpaca form) winked at her. Another teen declared, “This is more important than my graduation. I touched a sloth-Javier and now I can die peacefully.”
All proceeds from the event went to Wildlife Reconnect, a nonprofit helping rehabilitate animals used in film sets—though some insiders joked it was “also a therapy session for emotionally neglected moviegoers.”
While some critics called the act “a Hollywood cry for help in fuzzy form,” others are hailing it as the most memorable publicity stunt since Joaquin Phoenix pretended to be a rapper.
Will Pitt and Bardem now be offered roles in Madagascar 4: Celebrity Safari? Only time and internet petitions will tell.
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